Someone once told me he cannot sleep without blogging, now then I realise how true it is.. I miss you people..miss this venting space.. Though I'm not hoping for a lot of people to read my blog, but I know you who read this space is concerned for me.. I really appreciate your comments, written and silent.
I really worked loonnggg hours today - I was still in office at 11pm. Alone in the big office! It's kinda scary actually, cos I'm the only one with lights on.. the rest of the corners had already switch off their lights.. And to think that we had a very good colleague who just died in a car crash some months ago...can be quite creepy ok.. Howver, if not for my family who are leaving for a weekend getway in the next few hours, I'd have stayed to finish my work in office.. Just hope to come home and spend time with them before their trip, when they return I'll be in India.. It'll be another week before we see one another again.
Somehow I enjoyed staying late, doing my work.. Yes, I admit my mind tried to spook me from time to time.. but I just feel so secured, so contented with the silence.. In fact, I was kinda hoping to see 'something' or some spooky experience.. I believe in spirits and ghosts, in fact I had some mild encounters when I was young.. But anyway.. precisely I know they DO exist, the more I love God - because He's even Greater than all those! Not to be religious, ok? But don't you think it's funny - when you tell people there's spooky/haunted spirits, they'll believe you. Yet, when you tell them God's Spirit is present, you'll be labelled as 'religious' or 'spiritual freak'. Human are selective in their perspectives..
Speaking of perspectives.. I had the pleasure of chatting with TH last night..It's a impromptus call from him..It's really good to hear from him again, after all these years.. He has not really changed much in his lifestyle, though I must say he's kinda matured now (I guess he has to be - everyone has to grow and think for the future regardless how reluctant we are). Somehow chatting with him kinda 'open my eyes'. This is the person whom I loved so much, almost died for and even came back for, after losing more than 1.5litres of blood during operations (I can never forget the face of my surgeon when he told me he nearly lost me at the table.) .. God's ways are indeed higher than my ways.. I am so myopic to see His plans for my life..Yes - I loved him but yet God knows he's not the one for me.. I cannot believe how vast apart is our perspectives now..
I can understand what and where he's coming from, and so does he. We had a good chat, but somehow it's just not the same as before.. We used to be able to chat and share so many views.. but now.. we are merely talking on '1st-2nd level' friends..Then I really realise what's life is like - people came, left footprints and go..It kinda scares me too.. Will this happen with B in future? TH was the one who caused my physical 'death' and we end up in this level.. How about B who was so much a part of me that could cause my mental 'death'? I really do not dare to think.. God has His ways and He is in control...I can only pray for His Strength to walk this path..
OK, i got to sleep. have to wake at 5.30am to see my famiy off and now it's nearly 2am! goodnight, my dear.. keep praying-there's power in prayers!
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